black/white
by Wyvern
Summary: Hmmmm...what to say....short, weird, something I conjured up for no reason. --- Heero questions himself in a dream, with the help of D-chan! ^.^ Warning: Mild yaoi content.


**black/white**

By: Wyvern  
japeena@hotmail.com   
http://moonmonkey.iwarp.com  
Rated: AA (OR PG 13...I guess)

Warnings: This fic contains scenes of shonen-ai, and yaoi affection. There is no hentai, but for any one skirmish about boys in love, get lost. 

    OooOoooo...my first, non-comedy GW fic. And boy-howdy is it short! ^_^ And weird. Yup, definetly, definetly weird. I'm quite happy with it, though. I don't know why, but I really loved writing this particular fic, and I'm very pleased with the results.  
    When I was writing this, I was thinking of the oddity of dreams, Shakespeare, and how strange love can be. (That's very deep stuff for me, waa hoo!) You know how in Shakespeare, to fully understand his pieces you have to re-read them, uncover layers, and really put yourselves in the shoes of the character? Of course, I couldn't meet up to something like that in a million years, but I decided not to make everything in this crystal clear. I'm hoping that if you stop and think about it though, metaphors for life and death, for love, and for the human spirit, you'll understand what I meant. Ummm.....here's hopin'! (Otherwise, I'll just look like a nut.)

*****Gundam Wing and all its characters are copyright © all of its specific owners, those of which I respect highly but am just super lazy and don't feel like finding out who they are. The song 'The Mystic's Dream' belongs to Loreena McKennitt, I just borrowed it 'cause I think it's gorgeous, and fits with the fic. (You really should hear it, it's wonderful. Then again, maybe that's just the celtic in me.) ^___^*****

Enjoy! *runs away and squeals in anticipation*

~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~

    The cicadas in the trees screamed and sung under the oppression of the unforgiving afternoon sun. When a breeze managed to thread it's way across the field, just enough to brush across flushed cheeks and necks, it barely lived long enough to be thanked. Five bodies on the diamond breathed in the thick scorching air, expelling it in gasps of furnace temperature.   
    "C'mon Trowa, make Heero work for his money!" Duo chided, smacking the palm of his glove a few times with his fist before bringing it back to the ready. Trowa shifted around the weight on his feet and gave the bat a few practice swings.   
    "Where do you want it?" Quatre asked.  
    He motioned with his bat, then crouched into the proper stance. Quatre nodded, pulled back, and pitched the ball right for him. It missed the mark, but in compensation Trowa sent it to kiss the dirt at second base. "Whoo!" Duo exclaimed, standing from his squat.  
    Wufei bolted from his position around first and snapped up the ball, but his dash wasn't quite fast enough and Trowa claimed the spot. "Good hit!" Quatre cheered. Trowa smiled, Wufei mumbling beneath his breath as he threw the ball back to the blond pitcher and jogged infield. He would bat next.  
    In the outfield, Heero sighed and crossed his arms. That was the third grounder. He hadn't had to do much since he'd been up to bat, and the heat was beginning to suffocate even the perfect soldier. He blew his bangs out of his eyes and flexed his free fingers while Wufei prepared to hit. "Howya doin' pumpkin?" Fixing his glare on the caller, Heero said nothing. Duo grinned and turned his hat back around. "You're lookin' pretty hot!"  
    "Shut-up," Heero muttered, barely audible.  
    "I was talking about the temperature, but sure thing, sweet-cheeks!" he yelled with a chuckle, Quatre joining him in a broad smile. Heero rolled his eyes.  
    "Excuse me, Mr. Hormone? Could we get started please?" Wufei snapped. Duo stuck out his tongue, but brought the glove up.   
    The braided pilot was in his element, and Heero hated him for it. Duo had always been a summer-lover, while Heero treasured the fall. These hot, sticky days were about as fun as dinner with a certain debutante, and he only did it because... The crack of bat against ball rung around the field. Because...  


    A sound as familiar as breath suddenly barked out, and Heero's muscles tensed, ready to tumble him away. Instead, he stood still where he was. A choked sound wrestled out of a throat, a leather glove falling to the dirt.   
    Lowering his head, Heero locked his eyes with a tiny pink gaze. Her sandy hair was pulled back into a braid, tied with a yellow ribbon. A lovely smile danced across her lips and in those eyes, soon tiny teeth appearing from behind it. Her dress, white and trimmed in pale pink lace, was spattered with blood. It sprayed against her legs and stained her outstretched arms. The hands that held the gun were completely red, shining in the sun.   
    Heero looked down at his own stomach, and sighed in disbelief. His blue tank top was marred with a deep black stain and brighter spots of red, more coming with each passing second. The little girl giggled and dropped the gun on the grass. Leaning forward, she pressed her lips to the open wound, laying a butterfly's kiss on it. When she leaned back, they too were smeared in his blood. She merely giggled, then waved. "Bye bye!"  


~*~*~ 

_~ A clouded dream on an earthly night  
Hangs upon the crescent moon ~_

    Dusk had fallen over the Rebarbara mansion, the safe-house where the pilots had set up residence in-between missions. Heero moved his gaze over the home, but there was no sign of life in it whatsoever. Shadows of blue and black caressed each brick, each window pane and gable. The sky above was grey, the kind of sky that seemed to absorb everything below it.   
    He looked down at his stomach, smooth and untouched. Where the blood had once painted it, there was nothing now. To the touch, there wasn't even the slightest ebbing of pain. One would never think he'd just been shot.

_~ A voiceless song in an ageless light  
Sings at the coming dawn ~ _

    When he walked through the front door, there was no one there to greet him. Rashid didn't come through the archway and offer any kind of assistance, the kind that Heero usually ignored. Quatre did not appear to offer a hello. Duo did not come bounding down the stairs to attack him in an affectionate embrace.  
    For a moment, Heero thought he heard a flute playing, a faint sound that drifted out to his ears from the living room. He looked towards it, and it was gone as it had come. In a whisper of his imagination.

_~ Birds in flight are calling there  
Where the heart moves the stones ~_

    Before him lay the steps that led upstairs, where all of their quarters were located. Setting his foot upon the first, he started in surprise when he heard the light, fast pace of the Chinese pilot running down stairs. No body reached the bottom, no trace of the young man proved Heero's ears right.  
    Heero shook his head to shake away the loose spirits, and continued his ascent. At the end of the carpeted hallway, he stood for a moment, hesitant in his journey. The room that he shared was the last, the shut door staring back at him from the other end almost like some beckoning eye. With each step that he took, his hands shook a little more. When he finally reached for the knob, they shook so violently that it rattled quietly beneath his touch.   
    A slow creaking turn and the push inwards, and the door glided away from him to meet the wall. With a soft step into the room, Heero's eyes immediately focused on a figure in the center of the carpet, and widened. 

_~ It's there that my heart is longing   
All for the love of you ~_

    Duo sat there, his knees pulled up to his chest, his chin resting on those knees, and two enormous grey wings pouring out from his back. A lazy smile was on his lips, softened by the eyes that were half-lidded. Heero blinked, and the wings were gone, now only Duo the man sat and smiled.   
    Finding his breath, Heero began, "Duo you-" but was stopped when Duo pressed a finger to his own mouth.   
    "Shhhh...it's a secret." In a motion like water rising from a pool, Duo lifted to his feet and opened his arms to his lover. "The darkness is bright with what you don't understand," he said in a comforting tone.   
    "What?"   
    Duo closed his arms, and Heero suddenly found himself wrapped in that familiar embrace. The braided pilot's head fell to his shoulder, a soft chuckle fluffing out against his neck. "You're so scared, Hee-chan."  
    Heero took Duo's hands and pulled him away so that he could look into the violet eyes. "Duo, what's going on?"  
    "It's time to choose."  
    "Choose? Choose what?" Heero's lips were suddenly pressed up against his love's, a hunger moving and devouring his mouth. Duo's tongue danced and teased with Heero's, moving around his teeth, his lips, the bottom of his mouth. A touch so light it felt sharp inside the heated moment made Heero gasp, and a quick hand shot out to catch the thing that had run down his neck. Pressed between Duo's fingers was a long black feather that had an odd sheen to it. There was almost no light in the room, yet it shone and glistened with each turn.   
    "Do you like it?" Duo asked, as if he'd just given his lover a gift.  
    "It's....it's a feather, Duo."  
    Leaning in close, Heero thought for a moment he'd be kissed. But instead Duo's breath merely puffed against his nose as he asked, "Do you love it?"

_~ A painting hangs on an ivy wall  
Nestled in the emerald moss ~_

    The next kiss did come, but this one was so much more chaste. It immediately made Heero think of the first time he and Duo had kissed. Fourteen years old, in the Gundam's hanger, both so young and both scared out of their minds. The way that Duo's lips tentatively searched for affirmation from Heero was like that first time, when light brushes and short lived presses were all that they knew of.   
    The innocent touches soon became a little more hungry, a little more passionate and lingering. Soon the kiss had transformed into that hunger, that longing for love to be made. It wasn't the same as the black feather kiss...such kisses were lust. The way that Duo kissed Heero now spoke only of their love for each other.   
    Heero's breath escaped from him in short pants and gasps, choked swallows as Duo's mouth traveled down his neck and chest. In a bee-line for lower ground, Duo's gentle hands found themselves up inside Heero's shirt, lifting it up and over the flushed head to allow him better access to the finely muscled stomach.   
    Lowering his gaze, Heero's eyes widened at the sight of a white feathered held up against his chest by one of Duo's hands. The mouth stopped, violet eyes raising up to meet his. "Or do you love this, Hee-chan?" Duo's hand moved behind his lovers back, taking the white feather with it. Heero might have tried to follow it, if Duo hadn't begun to so expertly take his mouth back to his abdomen. Biting back his voice, Heero buried his hands in the dark hair, reveling in the way it brushed with silken caresses.   
    The farther it went down, the weaker Heero began to feel. He ached with the want of it, and so when the journey stopped, just above the line of his shorts, he almost screamed with frustration. "Say it Heero..." Duo's voice was husky and low, and Heero barely heard the words over the pounding in his ears.  
    "W-what?"  
    "Say my name."

_~ The eyes declare a truce of trust  
Then draws me far away ~_

     Heero closed his eyes in a plea for patience, he said, "Duo...please..." The kiss returned, light, chaste, angel's breath against his skin. Almost mad with the feeling, Heero moaned out, "Shinigami..." Teeth nipped, tongue lashed and sucked, hands clutched Heero's hips farther towards Duo's mouth as it ravaged his stomach. With a gasp and a jerk Heero loosened his grip around Duo's hair as he attacked him with raw sexual power. "Duo-" The virgin's touch returned, as if it was asking forgiveness for the unbound desire of those past few moments.  
    The area where Duo had decided not to waver from was beginning to feel sore. The skin there was red and hot from the savage attention that it had been given. Heero wished Duo would leave it, it was where he'd been shot after all.   
    Duo stopped and slowly rose his eyes up to meet his lover's. 

_~ Where deep in the desert twilight  
Sand melts in pools of the sky ~_

    "What's it gonna be, Heero?" he asked, rising up from his crouch, running his hands up Heero's bare back.   
    With a puckered brow, Heero stepped away. "Duo, what is this?"   
    His familiar grin returned to his features, Duo brought his arms from behind his back and held out his hands. Each one held a feather, one black, one white. "Which one do you love?"  
    Rage sprung into Heero's eyes, the insanity of everything happening fueling the passions. "What is going on, Duo?! What are you talking about? White feather, black feather, it doesn't make any sense!" Duo said nothing, only continued to offer the feathers. "Am I DEAD?! Are you Death? Are you offering me heaven or...or....-"  
    "No."  
    Heero ceased in his sputtering, locking his eyes on Duo. Tears streamed down Heero's cheeks, falling into his mouth where his teeth were shut tight. "What, no?"  
    "Heero, do you love the war?"  
    "NO! I hate the war, I hate having to fight!" he screamed. "I fight because I have to, HAD TO!" The hand with the black feather went behind Duo's back.   
    "Then you love peace?"  
    "YES!"  
    "Are you sure, Heero?"  
    Sobbing in exhaustion, Heero moaned. "What do you mean?"  
    "How is peace established?"  
    Wiping frantically at his face, when he failed to dispel the vision he answered shakily, "By ending war."  
    "Yes. How is that peace maintained?"  
    "By keeping war...away."  
    "Yes. How is this done?"  
    "By..." Heero blinked, "by enforcing laws."  
    "Yes. And how is that done?"  
    "With..force."  
    The white feather disappeared behind Duo's back, and now the black feather glistened in all of its dark glory. "So, you love this?"

_~ Sand melts in pool of the sky  
Darkness lays her crimson cloak ~_

    "No!"     "But to have this," the effervescent white feather reappeared, the two again held side by side. "You must have this."   
    "The white...and the black..." Heero whispered huskily.  
    "Where there is light there are shadows."  
    Tears dry and hazes cleared, Heero stepped forward and grasped Duo's wrists in his hands. "What are you trying to..."  
    "Choose, Heero," Duo said sternly, his violet eyes almost, not quite, but almost shadowed by the bangs that fell into them.   
    "Why--"  
    "The darkness is bright with what you don't understand."   
    "And if I choose, I will?"  
    "Where there are shadows, there must be light."   
    Releasing his lover's wrists, Heero took a step back and gazed at each feather in turn. The inky black feather shone, rivets of light running up the quill like light on water. The white feather sat dulcet, not shining, not shimmering, but glowing in a promise. Heero knew he had to choose something...one of the feathers...but Duo himself said that one could not exist without the other. He glanced up into the violet, a playful smile absent from his lips but dancing in Duo's eyes. It was the kind of look Duo wore when he was hiding a secret.

_~ Your lamps will call me home ~ _

Shh....it's a secret.  
Where there is light there are shadows.   
Shinigami  
Where there are shadows there must be light  
Which do you love?  
Duo

_~ And so it's there my homage's due  
Clutched by the still of the night ~_

    Reaching again for Duo, this time Heero gently wrapped his fingers around his hands, and slowly pushed them together. To make the feathers touch. The long black tip and the white connected, and Heero suddenly felt a fire lance out from his fingers and fly down every nerve. It was like he was burning from the inside, except that the pain you would expect just didn't come. It was instead like...pure....pleasure.

_~ Now I feel you move  
And every breath is full ~_

    When his head stopped spinning, Heero found himself cradled like a child in Duo's arms. His lover was smiling in joy, kissing his forehead, his cheeks, his eyes, murmuring his affections. Heero grasped onto his black shirt and buried his head in it. "I think I understand..."

_~ So it's there my homage's due  
Clutched by the still of the night ~_

    "Yes," Duo replied, his tone light and brimming with happiness, "you do, koi."   
    Heero sighed and fluffed his wings a little.   
    Laying his kiss in another soft gesture, Duo murmured, "Sleep now, my grey-winged angel."  
    Heero blinked, his eyes suddenly feeling heavy, a haze drifting across them. Again that night he asked, "Why..?" before drifting away from the arms of his love.  
    "So that you can wake up."

_~ Even the distance feels so near  
All for the love of you ~ _

~*~*~

    "Heero!"   
    "Is he alright?"  
    "I think he's coming around."  
    "Heero!"   
    Shadows were yelling at him, muttering at themselves, touching him, holding him. One of them was patting him on the cheek, another seemed to be holding his head up. It took a few moment's struggle, but little by little Heero was able to climb back up into consciousness. His eyes squinted and opened slowly, taking each blink to open just a little more. Looking around the small circle of shadowed figures, Heero was able to tell after a few moments that Trowa had his head, Wufei was stooped over him, and Quatre seemed to be giving his cheek a spanking. He muttered a protest and pulled his head away, only to hiss in a breath at the pain that stabbed him in the head as he did that.   
    Trowa pushed him up into a sitting position, keeping his hands nearby in case he fell again. With a moan Heero brought a hand up to the incredibly sore spot on his head, and noticed how hot it felt. "You're going to have a nasty bump," Quatre commented.  
    "Wh-what happened?"   
    "Wufei hit you with his ball."  
    "Shut-up, Barton," Wufei snapped. "Just because Heero's big head happened to get in the way of my home run is not my fault!"  
    Keeping his gaze level with the grumpy Chinese boy, Trowa said flatly, "Yes it is."  
    Wufei opened his mouth to retort but Heero interrupted. "Where's Duo?"   
    "He went to get some ice," Quatre replied.  
    "Here he comes," Trowa said.   
    Looking around Wufei, Heero saw his koi bounding across the field, fumbling to get his back-catcher gear off, the cold-bag held between his teeth. When he saw Heero, he waved to him and freed his mouth. "Hey Heero!" Running up to the group, a little breathless he handed the ice over to Quatre then got himself down back into a squat and gently put his hands behind Heero's neck. "Are you okay? That was quite the smack you got to your noggin."   
    Heero would have nodded, but he feared it would only send another throbbing reminder of his head-ache. "Hai, I'm fine." In a very odd display of public affection, Heero raised his own hands up to Duo's arms and let his forehead fall on the braided one's. "You wouldn't believe the dream I had."  
    Wufei grunted and stood up. "Well, I'm done here. I'm going to go round up the baseball stuff, since I don't think we'll be playing that anymore."  
    "Try me."  
    Trowa stood as well, "I'll help," and the two of them walked back infield.   
    Quatre rose his attention up from Heero's head and called to them, "Can one of you round up the water bottles? I'll carry them in."   
    Heero rose his eyes up to meet his lover's. Had he heard that little comment in between the other's talk? His head was still so muddled...   
    Duo took the ice pack from Quatre, holding it on the bump. "I'll stay here with Heero, we'll meet up with you in a sec, Quatre."  
    The blond boy smiled and nodded, then ran to help the other two.  
    "You must've really been thinking about something, Hee-chan. I yelled at you about the ball. I thought your 'perfect reflexes' would get you out of the way with room to spare!" he joked with a grin and a wink.  
    Questions flashed in the cobalt eyes for a moment before he let Duo's arms go and looked away. "It's the heat. I don't like it."   
    Duo laughed and slid his arm around his lover's back. "I know." Pulling him up, he supported Heero as they took those first shaky steps towards the Rebarbara home.   
    A few moments passed in silence as they walked, but of course, Duo wouldn't let that last long. "So, whatcha dream about?"   
    A lot of the dream was foggy, but parts of it came to him as clearly as the day before them. "White feathers, black feathers," he answered. The words fell from his mouth, surprising him. He couldn't have expected them anymore than he did Duo's next words, however...  
    "Grey wings, Heero. Grey wings."

~*~*~

_~ A clouded dream on an earthly night  
Hangs upon the crescent moon  
A voiceless song in an ageless light  
Sings at the coming dawn  
Birds in flight are calling there  
Where the heart moves the stones  
It's there that my heart is longing   
All for the love of you ~ _

                    'The Mystic's Dream'  
                                ~ Loreena McKennitt

***Owari***

C&C please!  
Arigato gozaimasu!

_~Wyvern_


End file.
